Awake at Night? What to Do When You Can’t Sleep

There are few things more frustrating than lying in bed at night, watching the minutes pass while sleep seems to stay just out of reach.

You may wake up in the middle of the night and find yourself unable to fall asleep again. Or perhaps you go to bed exhausted, only to discover that your mind suddenly becomes unusually active.

For most people, an occasional sleepless night is not necessarily a serious problem. But when difficulties with sleep become frequent and begin affecting everyday life, they can become a much more significant issue.

So what should you actually do when you cannot sleep?

Surprisingly, one of the most important things may be not trying too hard to force yourself to sleep.

Why Can’t We Sleep?

Sleep is influenced by several interacting systems, including our internal body clock and the natural build-up of sleep pressure throughout the day.

Stress, anxiety, changes in routine, shift work, travel, illness, pain, menopause, alcohol, caffeine and other factors can interfere with these systems.

Our thoughts can also play a major role.

When something is worrying us, the brain may remain alert because it interprets the situation as something that needs attention. This can make it difficult to switch from a state of mental alertness to one of relaxation.

Age can also influence sleep. As we grow older, changes in the body's sleep and circadian systems can make sleep lighter and more fragmented.

That does not mean that poor sleep is simply an unavoidable part of ageing. It means that the pattern and timing of sleep can change over time.

The Biggest Mistake: Trying to Force Sleep

When people cannot sleep, their natural reaction is often to try harder.

They close their eyes tightly, repeatedly check the clock and tell themselves:

"I have to fall asleep now."

But worrying about not sleeping can make it even harder to sleep.

The more attention we give to the problem, the more alert we may become.

Instead of treating sleep as something that must be achieved immediately, it can be more helpful to allow the body to become sleepy naturally.

This is one reason why modern behavioural approaches to insomnia focus not only on sleep habits, but also on the thoughts and behaviours that can keep insomnia going.

What Should You Avoid When You Can’t Sleep?

1. Don’t Stay in Bed for Hours While Fully Awake

Your bed is supposed to be associated with sleep, not frustration, worrying and endless scrolling.

If you have been awake for what feels like a significant period and are becoming increasingly frustrated, getting out of bed and doing something quiet and relaxing can be more helpful than continuing to struggle.

When you feel sleepy again, return to bed.

This approach is part of a behavioural technique known as stimulus control, which aims to strengthen the association between the bed and sleep.

2. Don’t Keep Checking the Clock

Looking at the clock repeatedly can turn a sleepless night into a countdown.

"It is 1:30."

"Now it is 2:15."

"I have to wake up in four hours."

That kind of mental calculation can increase anxiety and make relaxation more difficult.

Instead of monitoring every minute, try to remove the pressure of knowing exactly how long you have been awake.

3. Don’t Turn Your Bed Into an Office

Working, studying, answering emails or spending long periods doing stimulating activities in bed can weaken the mental association between your bed and sleep.

Ideally, your bedroom should become a place your brain associates with winding down and sleeping.

This is one of the principles behind stimulus-control approaches used in insomnia treatment.

4. Don’t Reach for Your Phone Every Time You Wake Up

A smartphone can be particularly tempting at 2 a.m.

You might check social media, read the news, answer messages or watch a video while waiting for sleep to return.

But these activities can increase mental stimulation and keep you engaged when your brain should be winding down.

The problem is not necessarily the screen alone. What you are doing on the device also matters.

A quiet, relaxing activity is very different from emotionally stimulating news, arguments on social media or work-related messages.

5. Don’t Use Alcohol as a Sleeping Strategy

Alcohol can make some people feel sleepy initially, but that does not mean it produces healthy or restorative sleep.

It can disrupt normal sleep patterns and may contribute to waking during the night.

If alcohol has become part of your strategy for getting to sleep, it is worth reconsidering that habit rather than treating it as a solution.

6. Don’t Compensate by Sleeping In for Hours

After a terrible night's sleep, sleeping much later than usual can feel like the obvious solution.

However, maintaining a reasonably consistent wake-up schedule can help protect your normal sleep rhythm.

The NHS recommends sticking to regular sleeping hours rather than sleeping in after a poor night's sleep.

7. Don’t Start Sleeping Pills or Supplements on Your Own

Magnesium, melatonin and various herbal products are frequently promoted online as natural solutions for sleep.

But "natural" does not automatically mean effective or appropriate for everyone.

The evidence for supplements varies, and some products can interact with medicines or cause unwanted effects.

If sleep problems are persistent, it is better to discuss treatment options with a qualified healthcare professional rather than experimenting with multiple products yourself.

So What Should You Do Instead?

If you wake up and cannot get back to sleep, try taking the pressure off.

Keep the environment quiet and dim. Avoid stimulating activities. If you remain awake and increasingly frustrated, get out of bed and do something calm until you feel sleepy again.

Reading a few pages of a book, for example, may be more helpful than scrolling through an endless social-media feed.

During the day, other habits can also support healthy sleep:

• Keep a consistent wake-up time.
• Go to bed when you are genuinely sleepy.
• Exercise regularly during the day.
• Create a quiet, comfortable and dark sleeping environment.
• Give yourself time to wind down before bed.
• Avoid excessive caffeine, nicotine and alcohol, particularly close to bedtime.
• Try to keep your bed associated with sleep rather than work or entertainment.

These habits can help, although they should not be confused with a complete treatment for chronic insomnia.

What Is CBT-I?

If insomnia becomes persistent, one of the most important treatments to know about is Cognitive Behavioural Therapy for Insomnia, commonly called CBT-I.

CBT-I is not simply a collection of generic sleep tips.

It is a structured approach that addresses the thoughts, behaviours and patterns that can maintain insomnia.

It may include techniques such as stimulus control, sleep scheduling, cognitive strategies and relaxation methods.

The American Academy of Sleep Medicine identifies CBT-I as the treatment with the strongest recommendation among behavioural and psychological approaches for chronic insomnia.

NHS guidance also notes that CBT can help people change thoughts and behaviours that interfere with sleep.

Importantly, some elements of CBT-I — particularly techniques such as sleep restriction — are best learned with appropriate professional guidance rather than improvised from internet advice.

When Does Poor Sleep Become Insomnia?

Everyone has an occasional bad night.

Insomnia becomes more concerning when sleep difficulties are persistent or regularly interfere with daytime life.

Short-term insomnia can last for less than three months, while long-term insomnia is generally considered when sleep problems continue for three months or longer.

Chronic insomnia is commonly characterised by difficulty sleeping at least three nights a week for at least three months, together with consequences during the day.

You should consider seeking medical advice if:

• Your sleep problems have continued for months.
• They are affecting your work, studies, relationships or daily activities.
• You regularly feel excessively tired during the day.
• You have loud snoring or interrupted breathing during sleep.
• Pain, anxiety, medication or another health condition may be contributing to the problem.
• Changes to your sleep habits have not helped.

Persistent sleep problems can sometimes be connected to another sleep disorder or an underlying health condition, so identifying the cause matters.

What About Sleeping Medication?

Sleeping pills are not generally considered the first solution for chronic insomnia.

Depending on the situation, healthcare professionals may consider medication for short periods, but sleeping medicines can have side effects and some can lead to dependence.

That is why persistent insomnia is usually better approached by identifying and addressing the underlying causes and considering evidence-based behavioural treatments such as CBT-I.

A Bad Night Does Not Mean Something Is Wrong With You

Perhaps the most important thing to remember is that one bad night does not automatically mean you have insomnia.

Sleep naturally varies from night to night.

Trying to achieve "perfect sleep" can sometimes create another problem: anxiety about sleep itself.

Instead of watching the clock, calculating how many hours remain before morning and desperately trying to force sleep, it may be more helpful to create the conditions in which sleep can happen naturally.

And if sleepless nights become a regular pattern, you do not have to simply accept them.

There are evidence-based treatments available, and persistent insomnia is something that can be assessed and treated.

The Bottom Line

If you wake up tonight and cannot sleep, resist the temptation to fight with your own brain.

Don't spend hours lying awake in frustration. Don't turn the night into a social-media session. Don't use alcohol as a sleeping aid, and don't start taking supplements or medication without understanding whether they are appropriate for you.

Instead, reduce the pressure, keep things calm, and allow sleepiness to return naturally.

And if sleepless nights keep happening, don't just learn to live with them — seek appropriate professional advice.

Health note: This article is intended for general educational purposes and is not a substitute for personalised medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. If you have persistent or severe sleep problems, speak with a qualified healthcare professional.

Sources & Further Reading

• BBC Sinhala, “What should you not do when you cannot sleep at night?” — the source material supplied for this article.
• NHS, Insomnia — symptoms, causes, self-help and treatment guidance.
• American Academy of Sleep Medicine, Behavioral and Psychological Treatments for Chronic Insomnia Disorder in Adults.
• American Academy of Sleep Medicine, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for Insomnia (CBT-I).
• UCLH Integrated Sleep Services, Insomnia & Sleep Medicine Clinic.